Angels
House
© 2007 by Tony Hearn
Chapter Two
Before launching into the
adventures, and misadventures, of creating the Angels House soup kitchen in the
capital of Texas, not in San Antonio where I had settled in late 1980 after
having lived for several years in the Hill Country at Wimberley (now that's a
whole other story of adventures and, certainly, misadventures), let me digress
to bring up an important matter.
A decade later in my life, I
learned a crucial lesson in going about the attempt to solve any problem. My
teacher was a member of the faculty of the Oblate School of Theology, again, in
San Antonio. I learned what I set forth below from a priest of the Catholic
Church. His name, at the time, was Father Daniel Helminiak. He has since
returned to the ranks of the laity, or, in other words, he no longer wears a
round collar. It was his choice. He was not defrocked. Dan possesses two
doctorates: one in theology from Boston University and the other in educational
psychology from the University of Texas at Austin. He was also a student while
in Boston of Bernard Lonergan, the Jesuit theologian. Both knew what they
taught brilliantly. Father Lonergan has now gone to his reward. Dan teaches at
a university in western Georgia.
Father Helminiak, who I now
call Dan, offered a course at Oblate in "spirituality." I learned
much from him. During the course, I learned, for example, that holiness has
little to do with notions of traditional piety. It has to do with becoming
authentic. I won't go much into the lessons I learned, but I will attempt to
set forth something that Dan learned from Father Lonergan. I will hardly do
justice to what I learned from Dan. But if anyone is really interested in
becoming holy, I refer the reader to their teachings elsewhere, including on
the Internet. Google (that's a bona fide verb now) either Dan or Father
Lonergan.
So, here I try to paraphrase
Father Lonergan's teaching on becoming authentically holy. It's a five-step
process.
The first step (1) is to be alert. It's using your eyes and ears and
other sense organs to know what's going on.
The next step is being (2) intelligent about what has been observed
The next step is being (3) rational about what the observation really
means.
The next step is being (4) reasonable about adopting any appropriate
actions that seem to be needed.
The final step is to be (5) responsible. It's taking action, based upon
being alert, being intelligent, being rational, and being reasonable. Being
responsible is actually making the appropriate response. It's doing something!
Now, back to the story of Angels House. Obviously, I was anything but
authentically holy when I awoke later that morning after having given away the
$20 bill.
I went off half-cocked. Thank God! I was only setting out to start what
I thought I was being asked to do: start a soup kitchen. I was not setting out
to conduct a "holy" war. I was not setting out to start a crusade, or
a pre-emptive war. (But that's another story, isn't it?)
I awoke with a start. The sun was up but not by much. I sat up in my
bed! All I remember was having heard what I took to be the voice of God. I
remember saying, "Yes, Sir!" before falling asleep. I recalled
vividly having heard what I thought was: "You will stand in a breadline if
you do not help anyone who asks for your help!" That was a sober thought!
It wiped any sleepiness from my brain.
I got out of my bed and searched in my closet for a pair of new tennis
shoes I had recently purchased but never worn. I dressed informally and put on
the shoes. "I've got to find a location to begin helping anyone who asks
for my help!" I said to myself. "I've got to find a place somewhere
in downtown San Antonio, some place close by."
Plans were forming in my mind. I reasoned I could find a place, rent
it, and start cooking and serving bread and soup within a few days. I would
feed the hungry, like the older man and his son, a meal for free at noon, and
then I would go do my paying job at night. With my salary, I would finance the
soup kitchen. I, of course, was being carnal. I was possessed, not by a
spiritual mind, but by a carnal mind, as in chili con carne.
I was going off without proper preparation. I was thinking of giving
out physical help. And, because I did not pray sufficiently, my mind was led,
by dark forces, no doubt, along inappropriate paths. The thought I was
"being called" by God to open a soup kitchen became as concrete,
firmly set in my mind. The dark forces were clearly "angels of
light."
Everything would work out nicely, I thought.